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| 20 Real Home Truths to Make Hippies Cry |
| Written by Jon |
|
1. No one will ever love you and you will die alone and forgotten. 2. You're a burden on your friends and family and the state. 3. The stripper didn't really think you're funny; she just wanted your money. 4. The boss isn't really a cunt. That's his job. You're the cunt for not realising that. 5. Your virginity isn't a special gift for someone you love. Sell it on Ebay. 6. Children are not angelic miracles; they are life sucking, screaming little shits who smell. 7. Democracy is not a sham - just the self centered evil fucks who participate in it are. 8. Psychiatrists are completely insane. The only people madder than Psychiatrists are their patients. 9. Spirituality is good. Religion is Evil. Reserved for people too dumb to make their own mind up. 10. Even if you are not a selfish fuck people will tell you you are - therefore - learn to punch. 11. No-one can coach you to be successful. Either work an eighteen hour day or don't. Fuck you and your class war. 12. The reason you think you have borderline ADHD is because you watch MTV, drink caffeine and never concentrate. 13. There is no such thing as an addictive personality... get some discipline or shut the fuck up whining 14. Shyness does not make you cute, special, or an individual. Social anxiety disorder is bullshit. GTFO outside. 15. Whenever a person tell you they love you, they are lying, to see how you feel about them. 16. Maybe 911 was a conspiracy. Maybe the Jews did do it. You ain't going to stop nothing by whining online though. So fuck off. 17. Your life purpose is gay. That's if you even have one. Anyone pretending to be altruistic and nice is a cunt. Avoid them. 18. The amount a country is hated is directly correlated to how many butthurt Camel fuckers want to live there and can't. 19. People say life is not fair. They are lying faggots. Life is very fair. The fact you don't get it is your problemo. 20. Do NOT give yourself a haircut unless it's a complete shave. Even then: think twice... |