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1. Succeeding to be Vague
2. Half a million seconds
3. The indefinable essence of you
4. Some ambulance
5. Need a Crap Living in the USUK
6. The Professionals
7. Calling for the Moon (and you)
8. For the Love of the Chav God
9. Inside the Pampas Grass
10. Starving in Love
11. Should have been a Skinhead
12. Under the Moon
13. When Never Comes
14. Let's Get Specific ------- 1. Succeeding to be Vague Smoking the back yard
She made me remember
The old embers of love
I waited forever waiting
Failing to relax and inhale
I acted forever acting
Succeeding to be vague
and dreary
Simply smoking the back yard
Everyday, burning the ground
That could feed starving kids
but than they don't live here
And life shows you should
Be grateful, but is anybody
Ever really that graceful anyway? Smoking the back yard in the sun
I remembered the old embers of
love, waiting forever waiting Succeeding to be vague
and dreary Succeeding when she near me
flowered like the dawning of the sun
we remembered the old embers of love And as a new day comes... Burning reason smoke poisons
Creation flames graze and cleanse
away any sense of grace in the
Memory of a face from another life
Reminiscing state of time Smoking the back yard
she made me remember
the old embers of love
Tossed into the sky above Over shoulders, over so many
years
I waited forever waiting
failing to relax and inhale I acted forever acting
Succeeding in loving this
hell.
Succeeding to be vague and then I died, and no body even thought, twice
Smoking in the backyard, she made me
Keep remembering the old embers of love. 2. Half a Million Seconds.
half a million seconds
beguiled crushed in
adolescent love
I have no mind
another breath brings
another decision a
dichotomy with no
choice whatsoever
and how long can it last?
before we begin to mention
something called love?
and why is the future like
a guaranteed failure? Just
through experience and naive
innocence, clinical excellence half a million seconds standing here
hoping for a hand, not acceptation or
rejection just to know you understand
that all this wasn't planned simply
suffered in ecstasy
for half a million
seconds child
I’ve loved you and waiting - for its return
the world has turned
no running anymore
Just standing For half a Million Seconds. 3. The indefinable essence of you
The words won't come
The words won't do
There's no single thing
I could say of you
Some justice that is never done
The words can run and run and run
Yet I'm subtly immobilized to all its
Rhyme, because your manner has a Rhythm
I could not define - and my mind hurts
So much you can never know - I can't reveal
Or Reap to sow - because I'm not a thought and
I'm not a feeling and I'm not someone darling
You should really believe in, but at the least...
The absolute least, I am true, in uncertainty - clocking
Probabilities and eccentricities of everyday reality
A sarcastic slacker on the roadside - forced pondering
The indefinable essence of you
This is what makes poets smash their heads, and young
Silly boys stayed stuck in their beds, older grotty
Men so cynical bled internally, drinking forever eternally
Taking the poison and labeling it as a cure, seeking
The indefinable essence of you. 4. Some Ambulance Think I'm going to die from a lack of sleep
The dreams that used to keep me under
They're crashing around and keeping me
Awake – Can’t stand this somniacal test
To Withstand a mind that seems
Compressed in utter lack of sleep
Another week Another Day
Another second – kill me now
Cause if
Suicide is painless
Than Tiredness is
Aimless and eternal
Seeking your skin
Seeking your soul
and…don’t you know? I BLAME YOU FOR THIS LACK OF SLEEP
Bumping into things in utter sonambulance
Sending out for some ambulance to bring
You here and save me walking around
Troubling the police in my sleep…
It's a consciousness
Gone grieving cause
The Sanity is so deep
You wouldn't call
I wouldn’t blame you
This isn’t your problem
This is my crucifix and
There is no fix now -
Excepting the feel of your skin, here, and forever
I BLAME YOU FOR THIS LACK OF SLEEP
Slay this sonambulance are you coming
In some ambulance to slap me awake so I
Can sleep? And do you even begin to believe
That Any touch from you could make me
Make me deeper, delivered from sonambulence
I BLAME YOU FOR THIS LACK OF SLEEP 5. Need a Crap Living in the USUK Eris wept, Hermes rocked, two and fro
Above and below, the ordinary, things
Seemed to occur on Gaia, but there was
Something else I'm getting at...
it's the Christians bringing Satan back...
Jews and Muslims squabbling
ordinary people lacking faith
Carry on Stabbing
Classical references don't rise the state of my soul
How should I be happy when it's a comedy nightmare
And all sanity goes astray, living in the US UK
But whereto émigré?
Wherefore art thou
Fame and Fortune
The Patriotic Priorities
No I've never stuck a job
Cause I never wanted to
Be Turning into one
It seemed too Grey
Living in the US UK
And I've never really had a life
Cause I've been imitating everybody’s ways
I've gone into one
It just seemed too grey
Insect Killing Buddhist-
into Christianity but with
A healthy splash of irony and
Then before sufi shaman metaphor
Working at something I'm not sure
Following some schizophrenic voices
And Noises of History, echo within me
And I excrete religion, Faith is action
And I need a crap. 6. The Professionals I took one look at your advert and
Turned the page due to all the clichés
Previously laid oh Professional, Yupping
Silly Buggar - Har de Har de Har Har Har
Strictly for the money was your life
And you sneered and deride the love
Struck in the loveliest eyes it's all
About the money love, money love all
About the money love and so on and so forth
-I'm a professional too in an amateur way
-Do you know the meaning of the words that You say?
It's all about the money love money love
Professionals, an army of zeros all all a
All about the money love and
The letters coming after your name
And the salary Games negotiated in
Total disdain for a quizzical rage of
A Professional getting minimum wage...
For what man can survive on the air?
Everyman if they ever dared cause
Hunger isn't as bad as the confusion
Of a professional sense of self-delusion
All about the money love. You've never
Grown a seed and simply taken what you need
You've worked hard for your place in the
Rat race, so, this is justification for
You self-satisfied fat face - so professional
And it's all, it's all, all about the money love
All about the money - ah - it's all about
Starbucks and the All Bar One, restaurants
You saw reviewed in the lifestyle pages of
You're up market version of the Sun.
Tell me now, can I join in your club?
Can I be a professional too... I've
Been to schools that were awfully
Unprofessional too - and now I'll..
I'll never spell right or earn Thirty K
I'll be drawing housing benefit the rest
Of my days - destined for a beggars grave
And I'm not bothered cause unlike you
I'm the unprofessional who's better than you
And it's not all about the money love, the
Money love, it's all about the meaning when
I read your page - just like this - in the
World today - everybody’s visionary everybody
Say's: Look at me look at me throw me lots of
Money now - because that's all success means and
You, you will be loved, because your pockets jingle
It's all about the money love
So damn professional I become
Only just by hating you and then
Guess what I've turned into?
A Professional. 7. Calling for the Moon (and you)
Dear light Get away, go away, get gone sun
Waiting on duskiness for the moon to come -
The Luna made me and sways the seas the
After sun calming all the burns of love
Taking mushrooms of the trees across her
Lightness, Tonight I'm motionless, Somehow
I'm going to escape this world we've
Made - where nothing can be achieved
and nobody can be trusted, and love
Is just an ugly rumour selling slavery
Well the moon is a beat and the beat keeps rising
I'm only sitting on borrowed lines - there's no
Religion that could stop my insipid theorising
Don't you think about it all the time? Chanting at the Moon all the lightness in the darkness:
Where are you? (she's somewhere dancing without fear)
What are you? (she's unbreakable but fragile my dear)
Who are you? (she flirts with everything but love)
Why are you? (She's sent from above)
When are you coming here?
When will this darkness bloom?
When will I lose the fear of the sun?
When will I see the Moon?
8. For the Love of The Chav God Diamond encrusted skull it's been done before
Just like this poem just like this crime of truth
If you think you're a piece of shit
You're going to act like a piece of shit
If the only attention and understanding
You have ever received is due to being bad
If the only ignore or ridicule and punishment
You have ever received is due to being good
If your only friends would make you murder
You would comply to be part of the gang
If your only enemies would make you think
You would complicity act from desire basest
if in only the most sanguine and meaningless ways If all this is true: You're a chav. No matter your clothes. And yours is the world my son - and everything in it. Now on me 'ed cunt… 9. Inside the pampas grass Chasing the wind again
All useless things of fun
Nothing so serious to know I could never ask it of myself Letting go of everything
Open wide with childish eyes
Very wise, angelically, not thinking
Every question revealing, I don't know Calling on the moon again
A night of failed expression
Nothing so serious, nothing so cold Yellow ribbons demark the trees to die
Our destinies of the very same kind
Undulating riddles and travesties of time Love now, letting go of everything
On metaphors and foreseen believing
Very stupid how I want to love and like
Everyone, but hate myself, and always run Cast inside the pampas grass
A memory removed from Love
Never too innocent to hate because Well there was nothing worth the hate
Entered the identity, left purity too late Letting go of clever lines
Over Chasing wind and I deny
Very much the everyday mind
Entering of the real lunacy Never faked - To love in freedom - inside the pampas grass. 10. Starving in Love here beg - do come
lonely dog unwanted
rabid lost insane son here wandering for love
last seen walking around
with anyone and poetry of
grace done fettered, done
scattered to die in the sun
With not comfort possibly taken in not being the only one
Starving in Love you would murder me
and I'd come back again
you would enslave it to yourself
you'd ridicule me to your friends
again and I'd come back again
but that's not graceful
that is quilted subtle
trends into relieving you of this feeling - the one
you wanted back again – and
revealing, beg, come, how do? you know the awful truths, but
Do you live them? Well yes. I Do. in not being the only one
Starving in Love and who'd be stupid to admit it
Or miss it tingling shifting moving
listless feeling died oh every footstep
Upon this Earth and I have Cried inside More times than I'd admit to and I
Want to die but the dreaming highs
and the curiosity remain the only thing
On which I can rely to stay alive... in not being the only one
Starving in Love. 11. Should have been a skinhead Should have been a skinhead
Could have been a scene kid
Or joined up and gone to war But non conformity is just
too conformist a clichéd thing
And being uselessly nothing is
the best option better by far you join your gangs to roam the
streets and all the prejudiced company
they keep don't bother me cause I’ll
be on anyone’s side, for another easy ride so then you know everyone’s pretty much
The same on the inside and uncomplicated
but inexplicable and insane, who could ever
gain - by acting like sheep ever assuaged To consider to condemn, not just us or them
But all metals of base more useful and real
Then the Gold that replaced it, so surreal Because the Palestinians - they need Israelis
And Governments need so many Terrorist babies
Slaves need masters and mendicants need pity
The country needs the town and the country the city So forgive me not for fighting principle
Forgive me nonresistance to your myriad wars
Allow me space to grow as I wish and as I harm
None, I will do as I wilt, for that is my only Law - and I should have been a skinhead
Not for the community but bad hairstyling sake
That plagues me - like an illiterate’s pedantry. 12. Under the moon
Tonight half a million people will die
half a million and more will be born
and I stare straight ahead on the way home
cause I just want to get inside somewhere
to belong
Tonight she's my only home, and insomnia awaits
every cryptically kept open secret and too many
weary long days diabolically thinking symbolically
linking verbosely into a lyrical drain bringing solace
to belong
Under the moon, all I can see, is somewhere under this
Is you, and are you looking too - wandering where to you
And would waiting forever be a little too long and would
perfection be reflection the image of theearth in the moon
and never to belong
under the moon Tomorrow is anything - fatality, mediocrity and mendacity
Adjectives slung with acrid vulgarity and unpleasent
commentary, if you wanted a message or some meaning to
live, why exactly are you talking to me, I never had one
need to belong
Under the moon.
13. When never comes
the time rolls by poisoned
chicken wings in the thames
all time squandered without
knowledge all wasted without
happiness
When never comes than they'll
Be such a mess, your eyes will
Mine possess to reconsider and
Send me to your pillow
and I'll have my
happiness - when never comes
and lonelyness will be the dawning sun
with emptyness in darkness yet to be done
and I'll have my happiness when never comes
these fifteen minutes with you
are all I've ever known - alone
when you even touched me
I lost my sight and sense
alive in happiness
but I know - when never comes
ther'll me such a mess - your
due to reconsider you already
possess send me to your pillow
I'll show you
happiness - when never comes
and lonelyness will be the dawning sun
with emptyness in darkness yet to be done
and I'll have my happiness when never comes
14. Let's get specific
my friends sometimes bore me
but than that reflects on me
and I'd be enthusiastic but
they'd soon slap me out of it
ex-wives come and ex-wives go
but how a story can rot instead
and lieing in my bed, it feels
kind of nice to be utterly alone
Let's get specific, it's not all terrifiic
it's spectacular than boring than blue
there's no sense in keeping on lying
I don't really like any so and so
it's mutual and just cause it's written down
doesn't make it true
And I don't mind - if I never love again
or have any single decent friend
I've seen her face, to be specific
it's something terrific
and just cause it's written down
doesn't make it true
Sometimes I dance alone it's true
but see it and I will kill you
a crack on the head is what you
get for laughing
let's get specific
I'm bored and I think of her
terrific
and the whole truth
is what you get for asking
and a crack on the head
is what you get for
telling the whole truth
let's get specific
I'm spectacular and
it makes me blue
and a crack on the head
is what you get for not laughing
because it's written down it's not
true, unless you want it to be, let's
get specific, self censorship
Is it a sin? or self preservating
a crack on the head - it's not what you do
It's how you do... delirious
I thought I'd give her children.
Then I got serious. let's get specific
Is it funny cause it's true?
tell me what to do?
lets get specific...
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